[E-pub] ⚑ Blasphemy! ⚔ Shop-peters.de

banners created by members of the Klunatics FB group Straight up if you are extremely religious and or find the idea of Satan as a main character to be offensive, this is not the story for you You have been warned up front You are 100% allowed to have a boner for Jesus, but please don t leave comments about how offended you are and blah, blah, blah I don t have time for such nonsense.In addition, I would like to make a request I thought about charging for this It s near 20K words, and I thought maybe a buck or two would make sense However, I ve been fortunate in that I ve had a very good year thanks to all of you , so I ask that you consider throwing a buck or five toward the LGBTQ charity The Trevor Project in lieu of any payment to me They are a wonderful organization who could use every cent they can get Every little bit helps, and just think You re doing it in the name of Satan.Trevor Project Donation Link First off, this short it absolutely perfectly named That said it is also laugh out loud hilarious Oh my Me as God would say and the thing that makes this story perfection is easily Jimmy I love everything about this story God, Satan, Donna gotta lover her but Jimmy is just beyond words that I can write You just seriously need go to Masterwriter not Masterbator Klune s website where you can download this for free This short is the author at his ridiculous awesome best [E-pub] ☨ Blasphemy! ♦ Blasphemy Or,When He Sees Satan Stuck In A Rut, God Provides A Little Divine Intervention, Suggesting The Devil Get Back To BasicsTaking God S Advice, Satan Answers A Summons To A Crossroad On Earth, Hellbent On Brokering A Deal In Exchange For The Soul Of The Human Who Summoned HimThe Problem With That Is The Summoner Is A Deviant Twink Named Jimmy Who Immediately Falls In Love At First Sight, Much To Satan S DismayBlasphemy Where God Is A Frat Bro Who Wants To Get His Brother Laid, Satan Absolutely Does Not Have Time For This Shit, And Jimmy Wants To Climb The Devil Like A TreeA Novella From The Twisted Mind Of TJ Klune, Coming For Free Exclusively To Tjklunebooks On December Th OMG I needed this Laughed my ass off Review to come If you need a good laugh and you don t mind some blasphemyyou should really let this one bright up your day HOLY SHIT, Tj Klune How do you come up with stuff like this I mean, you seem like a normal person see what I did there , but then you go and write wickedly irreverent and brilliantly outrageous stuff like this thing here, and I sit here in awe at how a story like this with hilarious dialogue just comes out of your brain Thank you for this Thank you for being you Keep on doing that. He thought about whistling as he walked to work, but then reminded himself that he was the Beast Who Brings Misery to All, so instead, he scowled at everyone he saw I didn t know that a 51 page story could make me this ridiculously happy, yet here we are WOW That was honestly one of the funniest, cutest, weirdest things I ve ever read in my life and it makes me want to go buy literally every single thing T.J Klune has ever released.Like, first, it s gay as the day is long, and there s even a bit about how heterosexuality is unnatural , which made my queer little heart cackle with glee Second, it s so sacrilegious, which is hands down going to bother a lot of people, so if that sounds like you, pass on this one But as a former Christian who doesn t mind a good joke being cracked at religion s expense, I was nearly in tears over some of this story like God s constant medammit and I swear to me remarks.Also, the thinly veiled political jabs I am LIVING This is everything I ever wanted And Jimmy is the most hilariously over the top ridiculous little thing I have ever seen Just WOW A Let s talk business Last week, we were talking about you taking the entire American South since they re mostly a lost cause You still good with that So long as it doesn t include Florida God rolled his eyes Yeah, no They re on their own from here on out Fucking wasteland, I shit you not Anyway, let s move on to white people who call the police on people of color for no other reason aside from being racist dicks You got the special area opening for them, right Yep Should be ready by next year We re constructing waterslides, but instead of water, it s spoiled mayonnaise Fuuuuck me, God breathed That sounds amazing I might need to come down for the grand opening just to see that shit You re so fucked up for even thinking of it I love it Satan warmed at the praise. Oh My God uh, I mean What the Hell DI knew this day would be shitty for me,and I wanted to start it with a smile on my face, so I turned to TJ Klune, I knew he wouldn t disappoint And Ho lee shit lolWhat better way to start your hellish day pun absolutely intended with Hell s own gatekeeper XD The one and only, the Magnificent, Beast form the East oh, uh sorry, wrong Beast lolThe Beast Who Brings Misery to All Capitalized that shit, motherfuckers D And now I m turning into Tiggy lolzIf you re Floridian, or a Vegan God forbid both , a personal injury attorney or just a Twitter user, the President and First Lady and everyone who follows them or Michael Bay please do read this book It is entirely possible that you ll be offended, especially if you don t have a sense of humor, but maybe you ll learn a thing or two about yourself.If you re a hateful Christian, please do read this book, cause I want you to be deeply offended.Lastly if you believe in God, the one who teaches you to be kind, to be considerate, to believe in equality, no matter the race, gender or sexuality, and you re up for a good laugh, please do read this book You will love it And for the love of Satan What s wrong with mayonnaise I love mayonnaise D Yum New free book by T.J.Klune.You can download it here have to admit that I did not particularly like Satan and Jimmy.Satan was too softy and sentimental for a million years old evil guy He should have been oozing wickedness and corruption Instead he was far too sensitive for my liking He is depending upon others to tell him how to be bad.And I certainly couldn t get his connection to Jimmy I think you have to be extremely desperate to end up with someone like Jimmy with his own personal issues.On the other hand God is the real deal Caustic, totally sarcastic and over the top godlikeOh my me, God saidMy personal favourite was Jesus And his interactions with his daddy, God, are hilariousI promised Jesus I d take him out cloud fishing today He s bitching about it, but I am not Jesus cried somewhere off screen I just don t see the point It s like you don t even know me I wish I was never born and then died and then was reborn again Anyway for a short novel, it is very compact and I am sure everyone will find something in it that it will make him her laugh or at least smile. WOW, that was certainly something And I ll let you know what as soon as I figure that out myself In spite of being extremely busy running hell, Satan found himself not only super bored, but also very lonely So God talked Satan into taking a day for himself, to have some fun doing something he used to enjoy, before his life got so hectic.But after deciding to play Crossroads Demon for a day, the last thing that Satan expected was to find himself confronted by Jimmy, a spunky, loudmouthed twink with a kink for handsome, red skinned devils Who are you Jimmy breathed He stopped near Satan, looking up at him with wide, dark eyes Are you my dreams No, Satan said, his voice thunderousI am your nightmare I am the thing that lives in the dark I am the I want to climb you like a motherfucking tree, holy shit evil that lurks in the whatAnd once Jimmy took Satan by the horns, well, he literally had Satan right where he wanted him Satan pulled Jimmy off his shoulder, settling him down in his lap He realized almost immediately how bad of an idea it was when Jimmy wriggled back and forth and whispered So proportional in an awed tone The humor in this short novella was kind of strange at first, so it took me a while to get in sync with the jokes, but when I finally did, I found myself enjoying it quite a bit.I especially liked the ending And Terrance That was a fun twist.I d rate this short at around 3.75 stars and recommend this free read for any TJ fans out there This is a FREE story on TJ s blog, available at http www.tjklunebooks.com new blog See All My Latest Reads Review Quick Links Well, this is for the lack of a better word definitely something I have no idea how to explain this book because this is something you gotta witness yourself But I immensely enjoyed this story If you are someone who s not easily offended, uptight and narrow minded, I assure you, you are going to find this book fascinating and hilarious Because we need power bottoms like Jimmy and cordial Satan in our lives 4 Satan is a purring kitten stars